Friday, November 30, 2001

i made it.
50,207 on friday night.

i'm tired emotionally and physically.

but i did it.
and i'm not finished.

not by a long shot.

but i can hear the sweet tones of miss gellar calling at me from beneath my tv.

i must go tend to her buffyness, before bed.

harry.
author of "it's like trying to breathe glass" :-)

From The Brunching Shuttlecocks: excerpts from a Mullholland Falls review.

The story is...well...it's kinda...well...that's a good question.

Basically, you have this blond chick from the Midwest who comes to LA with dreams of stardom. And you have this brunette who is in a limo accident, loses her memory and ends up in blond chick's shower. And there's a director who's being threatened into casting a certain actress in his movie against his wishes. And there's the cowboy, can't forget the cowboy.

This is style, baby, style. Your first thought upon seeing the film is that everyone in it is a very bad actor. You're wrong. Trust me on this. You may think the plot makes no sense. You're wrong. You may tell yourself, this is not my beautiful house, you may tell yourself, this is not my beautiful wife.


...

"Did I mention the lesbian sex? There are a couple of really, really wonderfully explicit lesbian sex scenes. They are hot, hot, hot, steamy hot, hot, hot. Makes everything else in movie completely unimportant. It's amazing what you can put up with in a flick if it has incredibly blisteringly hot lesbian sex scenes.

Fuck Harry Potter and Monsters Inc (and its Star Wars II preview). To quote a country yokel ute bumper sticker: "Dip me in honey and throw me to the lesbians."

I got dumped weekend before last, so I am currently eating:

worms

humble pie

shit (and die)

and so on. I would eat a bowl of fuck, but it's cold.

I did buy new sheets though, which makes all the difference. They're black. I made sure she saw them when she dropped in the other week. Ha.

Right now I feel like ... some rare 1st year arts/law fillet, with a garnish of skinny dance chicks. Table four please.

Wednesday, November 28, 2001

bugger.

ok.

i get the famke janssen one then!

double HA!



and i'm not that young......

heheh, you're a sick li'l monkey, young man... as long as I can have the tori amos pavlova... HA!

yum.

reese witherspoon pavlova :)

bored.bored.bored.bored.

but now:

thinking about miss witherspoon + cakey goodness :)

Umm, yeah, thanks Harry... ;-P
My AV experience on this trip has been somewhat disconcerting, with the Reese Witherspoon palaver, and watching 'The boy who could fly' in Kuala Lumpur airport - a treacly story about a magic boy. With Kevin Arnold, no less, playing a character called Kid Brother Who Moves To a New Neighbourhood With His Mommy And Liked Everything Better When His Dad Was Alive - with a name like that, no wonder he got picked on by the neighbourhood bully. And I'd watch TV in my hotel room, but the TV is not only not plugged in, but there are random wires hanging out of the back of it, so I don't think I can get it to go. My phone works sometimes though.
*giggle*

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA



although:

8 hours of reese witherspoon.....doesn't seem that bad to me...as long as you could turn the sound right down!

Tuesday, November 27, 2001

I also forgot to say that on the plane to malaysia, something went wrong with the in-flight entertainment, and we were treated to eight hours of "Legally Blonde" on all ten channels. Hurray!

Something's gone horribly wrong. I'm in india, but I'm sitting looking at softimage files instead of jetting around in an autorickshaw costing about 20p.

Sunday, November 25, 2001

you going to india miss noodle?

kept that one quiet.

Thursday, November 22, 2001

bugger, I get to be syphilis. Anyone want anything bringing back from India?

Wednesday, November 21, 2001

A WINNER IS ME!!1

All 'yes' results in:


Follow that meme! Happy AIDS Day!

I AM TEH EBOLA! I SNEEZE ON YOU! BLOOOD IS COMING OUT OF MY BOTTY! BOO-HOO!

All 'no' results in:


Take the Affliction Test Today! (How boring.)

First half yes, second half no, syphilis which we already have (boom boom) ...

Yes / No / Yes / etc results in : syphilis again ... same with No / Yes / No ... come on, I want to clock AIDS in time for World AIDS Day. Ahh well. Anyone else have any better luck?

In my opinion the robot quiz beats this one. Because I got to be Roy Batty in that. I'm still working on the animated png ...

i guess this explains an awful lot:


Take the Affliction Test Today!


Find out what debilitating disease you would be today!!!

From Helen

Tuesday, November 20, 2001

(yokel voice)
Look, Maw, 's one o' them there tumbleweeds!
(/yokel voice)

Thursday, November 15, 2001

hey, while doing some research for my novel

i stumbled upon this : allo

and also discovered that catatonic schizophrenia is really freaky. who would have thought that the ooman brain would be so f**ked up.

well.....

me for one.

Tuesday, November 13, 2001

Bill and Alex - you both didn't vote? You're a bunch of slackers!
Harry - keep up the good work, now all I have to do is catch up!
Everyone else - Ooh, look at that castle! *runs away*

Monday, November 12, 2001

i just wrote the best 2360 words of my novel ever & it was one of those awesome "i think i'll just keep going, because i've got no idea how it's gonna turn out" type sessions, which are rare for me...but they kind of help reinforce the reasons i write....

YAY ME.

now, where are those cheerleaders?

'scuse me. gonna try & squeeze some more out before bed......... :-)

Two things of mention: first, all you video game developers better sit up straight and watch this footage because it's the most accurate and insightful analysis of the video game industry to date.

Second, thanks to Howard closing the electoral rolls early, a great many of us slackers missed out on voting last Saturday. Of course, if the Democrats had used this slogan, they may have done even better than they did:




Sunday, November 11, 2001

the blogs gone all quiet.

must be this nonsense about novel writing...or something...good job i'm not doing it...

oh wait.

i'm on a break just now anyway :)

so have this you rowdy lot : click here....this will NOT make you happy mr bill!

and in other news.

miss noodles novel is really good..and it's geting better as she goes!

so there.

this has been a public service announcement on behalf of john hannah! (doh)

Wednesday, November 07, 2001

Yes, it's very wonderful, and the lovely Miss Purdey Longpuppy will indeed be on the lease (and occasionally, the leash). And there's a crazy bizarrey roman tenty thing in the back an I like it.

OOOOOOOOER!!!!! me an feisty done been gotted ourselves a new housey!!!! check this out.... yes yes yes there may be three bedrooms but none of you can move in, we have to have room for my Home Theatre Installation of DeathTM

I just found this Harlan Ellison interview on the onion, and I've been wracking my brain trying to find the best quote from it to get you to clicky on the linky - so after much soul searching and battering of face-on-keyboard here goes: "Look, kiddo, I don't know you. I have no idea how smart, how dumb, how educated, how ethical, how moral, how courageous you are. You're a telephone voice. You call me to interview me, and I'm supposed to be cute, so the readers won't say, "Jeezus, what a smartass mean fucker." But I don't know if you're as smart as I am. I like to think you're as smart as I am—I like to think everyone is. Probably a hell of a lot smarter, because I know how dumb I am, how much shit I don't know. So maybe what I'm saying is stuff that you yourself say, when you're sitting around with your pals at The Onion... do you look at each other and say, "Goddammit! The world is just filling up with more and more idiots! And the computer is giving them access to the world! They're spreading their stupidity! At least they were contained before—now they're on the loose everywhere!"?"

Monday, November 05, 2001

Harrys life review:

Cruel intentions
bad. worse than bad...maybe the worst, most unecessary film i've ever seen!

buffy
good. i'd like to shrink her down to the size of an m&m and position her in my breast pocket, where she could look out upon the world.

Playstation 2
Bad...but only because architecturally they're a f**king mess! trust me on this.

GTA 3
good...awesome game...one of the best i've played on a console....freedom, and huge environments, and loads of missions and gratuitious car-jacking and violence...reminds me of home :)

nina gordon
yum..official blonde chick of my novel! (link when i get home :))

writing a novel
insanity...distilled down to it's purest essence..and dripped into my eyes, which smarts a bit...but that soon passes!

so if you're harry....

this is how your life is going right now :)

If you're sick of Microsoft's touchy-feely Madonna-backed Jesus-titled Windows XP media barrage at the moment, take a quick gander at the page heading for the 3Com Discontinued Products page. I hope the one-tree-hill iconography means that Windows XP will soon become an unsupported product ... at least, an unsupported desktop OS. Microsoft wants a part of the action in the palmtop market -- but does 3Com need XP? (It has been pointed out in a letter to The Age's IT supplement that the letters XP, `Chi' and `Rho' were once shorthand for Ch-r-ist. Does anyone else want an Xbox for Xmas this year? Media-jamming graffiti campaign, anyone? IBM and Sony have already indulged in footpath graffiti campaigns, "Peace Love and Linux" in NY and the blue-square-question-mark respectively. MS have vague TV and billboard advertisments running in Australia currently, if they hit the footpaths, let the gamez begin =c]

PoliticalStrikes was always a good read ... but now that There's A War On, shit like this (a cartoon from last year) takes on a new meaning.

And remember, Feisty, is hirsute, is good.

Saturday, November 03, 2001

but Alex - I really don't want to think of Doug the rug and whip-n-lick in the same sentence. Ack!!

I bags first whip-n-lick of Doug the Rug if he gets shackled to the fence.

small hands. smell like cabbage.

Thursday, November 01, 2001

They should chain a Lazy Boy to the fence. Or a space hopper, or a large bowl of jelly or something. Or maybe they should just chain Doug the Rug to the fence and get it all over with.

I've got the song "I'm the king of the nighttime world (and you're my midnight queen)" by Kiss running through my head - you know - the one he has on the radio before he crashes the car in "Detroit Rock City"........

I'll get my ug boots.

The current consternation re: bicycles at the building at which some of you work has been brought to the attention of the (non) organisers of Critical Mass, one of whom I happen to not be (along with another poster to this blog). Methods for addressing such which have so far been postulated were: a) running Critical Mass through the lobby of your building and b) This rather novel solution. Ideas?