Wednesday, October 27, 2004

So, I know I have been pretty quiet lately. It's like I'm trying to catch up with unca fuzzy or something... *grin*

Mostly this has been due to pooey first trimester tiredness... which is basically tiredness that goes up to eleven. It's kind of like jet lag, bloatiness and hangovers together at last, only it has been going for about 8 or 9 weeks now. Poor poor me.

Emotions too have been going up to eleven, so I drew you all a little diagram...

Thursday, October 21, 2004

A wee word to you all.

Thanx to Harry I have been able to extend my residency by 5 years from here in this septic isle, for a mere fifty notes.

So I'll be able to save a few bob rather than return earlier on said bobs.

I miss you all, but Melbourne is seeming more and more like a beautiful fantasy with every day of this substandard ineffectual island.

I miss my friends and feel increasingly like my friends are imaginary, as I am the only one here who knows who or where they are.

love to you all from your imaginary friend

Pol x

Wednesday, October 13, 2004

Strong Economy Points to Rate Rise

To Every Single "Mortgage Battler" who voted Liberal on Saturday, because you were worried about your fucking hip pocket ahead of every other criterion for choosing a government:

Fucking Suffer. I hope you lose your fucking house.

Know something funny? I don't have a mortgage. And I'm fucking glad. When all your debt driven "new wealth" collapses around your ears when rates hit 10%, I'll be standing there with cash in hand to buy your lovingly renovated Californian Bungalow for substantially less than you paid for it.

It's your own fucking fault for taking John Howard at his word. Really, what were you thinking?

Tuesday, October 12, 2004

i would have voted if i could have.
but am not allowed to.

four more from the prime miniature.

how unbelievable.

Monday, October 11, 2004


A UN committee has released a report announcing that Australians are officially ‘dickheads’ for re-electing the Coalition government. “We were prepared to concede that previous election was a lapse of judgement, perhaps even an outright mistake,” said a spokesperson for the UN, “which is why Australian citizens simply earned a ‘Loser’ rating. This time we’ve ruled out human error – Australians are clearly dickheads”.
The damning 56-page report tables the impressive dickhead-esque behaviour of Australians of voting age, citing letters to newspapers and pub conversations as evidence to support the dickhead charge.
Prime Minister John Howard said he was humbled by the UN report, claiming that his government would be representing all dickheads. “This is a big win for Australia and a big win for dickheads,” declared the prime minister, who in the lead up to the election had promised billions of dollars to support dickheads from a wide range of backgrounds. Dickheads with fast money, dickheads with chainsaws, dickheads with health insurance, racist dickheads, dickheads in private schools, and good old ordinary Australian dickheads will be among those benefiting from the government’s largesse.
Critics of the report have demanded that those Australians who abstained from voting, or who cast their vote in favour of the opposition, should be reclassified as ‘Provisional Dickheads’. But in the face of limited public disapproval, the official UN position has remained steadfast: “Let’s call a spade a spade, and a dickhead a dickhead”.

Friday, October 08, 2004

This is funny, but I wish there was a way of knowing if it really happened or not. I've already been burned on the whole Captain Pugwash thing. I'm not sure if it's so much about gullibility as just that I want to believe.