Annual bump is annual














Quiet blog is quiet












Too many babies! Gotta start eatin' em. AH NOM NOM NOM NOM



THANKYOU FOR CALLING TELSTRA THIS IS COOKIE

HOW MAY I DIRECT YOUR ENQUIRY TODAY? ... UH HUH ... UH HUH ... PLEASE HOLD FOR COOKIE BREAK! AH NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM

*busy tone*

bump for great justice.

"I reclaim this blog in the name of Mars!"

Before & after retouching pictures of models.

Just wait a bit after the pic loads then roll your mouse over it to see the pre-retouch version.

http://glennferon.com.nyud.net:8090/portfolio1/index.html

Hey look! It's a PC demo for that game I was working on:

here

I guess that means it's coming out soon.

Bram does an impression

Greasy Joe's
Originally uploaded by billyjoebob.

Can anyone guess who this is?

I had a dream last night that I'd grown breasts. They were quite nice.

But for some reason, I was really upset & unhappy about it.

That is all.

from http://www.juiceenewsdaily.com/0605/entertainment/atari_mel.html

"Melbourne, Australia – Australia's oldest video game development studio is working on a PlayStation®2 port of Eden Games' Test Drive: Unlimited, the latest in the Test Drive series."

...

"Sources close to the studio have confirmed that the title in development is a PS2 port of Eden's next-generation Xbox 360 game."

Let's read that again shall we, just to make sure we have the facts straight.

"...the title in development is a PS2 port of Eden's next-generation Xbox 360 game."

Now if you will excuse me, I must return to my job in the games industry that doesn't involve porting someone else's game to a far less powerful console.

This is f#@cking gold.

Naomi Robson, of Today Tonight fame has a spack out.

And here's the relevant audio.

No doubt it was actually the results of some fat, unemployed lebanese builders kids who were trying to rip her off, while bludging on the dole and tearing their family apart with their terror tantrums.

...

Makes you think, doesn't it?

===FIRST POST=== of the new era! RAAAAAAY

Wait, I should do this properly.

F1R5+ P05+!!!!11111oneoneone

Congratulations again to parental unit Billeneve Penfordennis on the arrival of The Bram.

May your nights be quiet and your days be merry.

Are you planning on wetting the head? Need a priest? ;) I'm not sure what the baptism rites for the Subgenius are ... although I think it's important we recognise The Bram as being an Overman as soon as is superhumanly possible ... it's less than two months to X-Day! PRABOB.

"The Ultimate Game Chair includes two mounted speakers, a pair of special designed half controllers that are attached to flexible rods poking out from either arm of the chair, and 14 vibrating motors. The force feedback motors allow the chair to deliver direction blasts of rumble so you can tell where gunfire or sounds are coming from. The best part is that it’s only US$750."

I think I need one. Maybe two. In an astonishing coincidence, it's likely that two of these chairs plus shipping would almost exactly equal our $3000 baby bonus. If that's not fate I don't know what is.

Also, I want one of these. It's pretty.

Some things i have learned during my trip to the mother-land.

Meet the parents didn’t need a sequel. Meet the fockers is that unnecessary sequel.

Japanese TV makes no sense,

There’s a hotel adult channel called blue-cherry,

The smell of shellfish pasta fills a plane really quickly,

10 hours is the reasonable upper limit for a flight. Knowing that after 6 hours you’re only halfway done is tedious as hell,

People in England are genuinely unfriendly,

The London Eye is really close to the Houses of Parliament (and goes quite high)

The London Underground is HUGE. And parts of it look like a sci-fi set.

Some things change quite a lot in 4 and a half years, and others stay almost exactly the same.

After months of speculation:

the ABC picks up the new Doctor Who.

No sign of a screening date though :(

Desci blogged this, and I'm sure I've seen it before, but I can't remember when or why...it's freakish and strange and perplexing but compelling:

Post Secret

their manifesto:

You are invited to anonymously contribute your secrets to PostSecret. Each secret can be a regret, hope, ,experience, unseen kindness, belief, fear, betrayal, desire, feeling, confession, or childhood humiliation. Reveal anything - as long as it is true and you have never shared it with anyone before.

Create your own 4-inch by 6-inch postcards out of any mailable material. But please only put one secret on a card. If you want to share two or more secrets, use multiple postcards.

Please put your complete secret and image on one side of the postcard.

You may mail your postcard inside an envelope if you prefer.

Tips:
Be brief - the fewer words used the better.
Be legible? - use big, clear and bold lettering.
Be creative - let the postcard be your canvas.

PostSecrets are more likely to be displayed if they are short, easy to read, and creative.

Mail your secrets to:
PostSecret
13345 Copper Ridge Rd
Germantown, Maryland
USA 20874-3454

Email questions or comments to: Frank@docdel.com

God, we're slack. Nearly a month between posts.

I guess the reason I haven't posted a lot is that icreasingly my life seems to be preoccupied with the whole pregnancy thing... it gets in the way (of me leaning forward, of sitting up straight at my desk and still being able to reach the keyboard...) So you get the idea.

When you realise that any second now, you could suddenly start being a mum, life gets a bit strange, not to mention scary. How am I going to not fuck it up? When Bill and I were talking about kids, there's so much we didn't think about - who is going to explain war/poverty/the liberal party? How do you explain to a small child that there are bad people out there, but no, really, you're safe?

The other night at about 3am, we heard an unusual noise in the living room. Being that it takes me several minutes to get out of bed (dunno what will happen if there is ever a fire!) bill got up to find purdey sitting bolt upright (and clearly pleased with herself) in the wicker bassinette. Yes she was naughty, and yes it had better not be something she tries when pumpkin is here, but I wish bill had taken a picture.

How do explain this kind of stuff to a kid, "sorry you're not allowed to play horsey with the dogs/cover the kitchen with flour to make snow/charge headfirst and repeatedly into a wall with a bucket on your head, but it's okay for us to laugh at you and film it for funniest home videos"?

I want one!

Is anyone else surprised by this? I guess this is something I learnt when I was a kid (probably from my book "365 Things To Know") but, being about 5 when I read it, I don't think I was fully up to speed with the full political rigmarole... so it turns out that the Isle of Man is a self-governing territory, and isn't actually in the united kingdom...

Gather round, chilluns, Uncle Bill has a story to tell. Once upon a time there lived a man who wrote amazing stories. He rocked, and then he died. That sucked.

Here, for your reading pleasure, is my favourite piece of his work.

Vale, Hunter S. May the Force be with you.

Few people understand the psychology of dealing with a highway traffic cop. Your normal speeder will panic and immediately pull over to the side when he sees the big red light behind him...and then we will start apologizing, begging for mercy. This is wrong. It arouses contempt in the cop-heart. The thing to do - when you're running along about a hundred or so and you suddenly find a red-flashing CHP-tracker on your trail - what you then want to do is accelerate. Never pull over with the first siren-howl. Mash it down and make the bastard chase you at speeds of 120 all the way to the next exit. He will follow. But he won't know what to make of your blinker-signal that says you're about to turn right. This is to let him know that you're looking for a proper place to pull off and talk...keep signalling and hope for an off-ramp, one of those uphill side-loops with a sign saying "Max Speed 25"...and the trick, at this point, is to suddenly leave the freeway and take him into the chute at no less than a hundred miles an hour.

He will lock his brakes at about the same time that you lock yours, but it will take him a moment to realize that he's about to make a 180-degree turn at this speed...but you will be ready for it, braced for the Gs and the fast heel-toe work, and with any luck at all you will have come to a complete stop off the road at the top of the turn and be standing beside your automobile by the time he catches up. He will not be reasonable at first...but no matter. Let him calm down. He will want the first word. Let him have it. His brain will be in a turmoil: he may begin jabbering, or even pull his gun. Let him unwind; keep smiling. The idea is to show him that you were always in control while he lost control of everything.

It helps to have a police/press badge in your wallet when he calms down enough to ask you for your license. I had one of these - but I also had a can of Budweiser in my hand. Until that moment, I was unaware that I was holding it. I had felt totally on top of the situation...but when I looked down and saw that little red/silver evidence-bomb in my hand, I knew I was fucked... Speeding is one thing, but Drunk Driving is quite another. The cop seemed to grasp this - that I'd blown the whole performance by forgetting the beer can. His face relaxed, he actually smiled. And so did I. Because we both understood, in that moment, that my Thunder-Road moonshine-bomber act had been totally wasted: We had both scared the piss out of ourselves for nothing at all - because the fact of this beer can in my hand made my argument about "speeding" beside the point.

Just in case anyone is confused, at last, the Buffy Sex Chart (SFW).


Thick edges are sex. Dotted are kisses only. Solid is unknown/vague.

Isaac Hayes shares his culinary techniques to woo the ladies. You know you want a midnight love omlette.

King of the kitchen - Books - www.theage.com.au