I've been a bit quiet on all this to medicate or not to medicate stuff, cause, well I think harry knows my opinions... but the rest of you don't (probably) so here goes.
1. I think you need to see a FULLY QUALIFIED PSYCHOLOGIST. Think it's expensive? How much is sanity worth, and how much have you spent so far? I really don't think your counsellor is helping. Sorry, but that's the go.
2. I think that *if* - and only if - your fully qualified psychologist thinks it's a good idea to go on meds, then you should do it. The chances are they've seen a lot of similar things and already know what works. That's what having a big brain and a doctorate tends to do for a body.
3. I think that you might not enjoy the pain, but in some ways you're used to it, and it is going to be pretty strange when it goes away. And no one can tell you what to fill that particular gap; that's for you to figure out.

My brain failed it's roadworthy a while ago too. I'm a snob - I have a designer dog, polished floorboards and an eggplantmobile* (even though I can't drive**). So I went to a person who had more letters after her name than anyone else. Now before anyone saddles up and rides off into the sunset on their high horse (no doubt galloping along over moral high country) I'm not trying to say that my problems are the same, as bad or any worse than anyone else's on feistynoodle (incidentally, the noodle part of my nickname was given to address my inherent lunatic/rambling/spazmatic proclivities, albeit in a generally harmless way). But I digress.
This woman really helped. I can't say that I'm never going to have another panic attack, feel severely insecure, catch WIS (What If Syndrome) or get completely stressed out with life the universe and everything, but I know how to deal with these things now. I know what causes them, I know how to avoid them in the first place, I know how to deal with them when they occur, and perhaps more importantly, I know not to let these things overwhelm or destroy me.
Harry - all I can say is, go talk to someone who's suitably qualified. The people you're talking to mean well, and might be quite handy with some problems, and they might have helped with some issues, but I don't think they can take you where you need to go.

As for feistynoodle drinks, yep, sounds good.


*Well not at the moment cause we were in an accident on Saturday. (All ok though, apart from car, which is in hospickle)
**This is not a personal observation following the accident - I just don't have my licence.