Further to a conversation I had with Mr. Harry and FN on Sunday night (Shrek gets one snutty thumb up and one ear-waxy thumb down btw) I am interested in people's ideas for: Nasty Surly Offensive Phrases To Put On Your Coffee To Mug Scare And Intimidate Your Co-Workers. Ideas so far include:

"Just because it happened to you doesn't mean I want to hear it" (that one comes from Brother Housemate Grub)

"If you don't tell me about your weekend, I won't tell you about the knife strapped to my leg"

"I could tell you about my weekend, but I'd be breaking a court order"

... and so on. Now I'm sure we came up with better ones the other night ... or was that the hot chocolate and iced coffee talking?